I married a man who cleans the kitchen—and honestly, that has made all the difference in our marriage. Let me explain.
The other night, I headed out to a little get-together right after dinner, leaving behind a table and sink piled high with dirty dishes. Normally, leaving a messy kitchen would send me into a spiral of guilt. But that evening, we were running behind in a major way. I was simultaneously trying to put mascara on with one hand and wrestle Annie into her pumpkin romper with the other. Chaos, basically.
On the drive home, I told myself I would tidy up before washing my face and collapsing into bed. So imagine my utter delight when I walked through the door—and the kitchen was sparkling clean. Every dish put away, every counter wiped down. My jaw dropped. My heart swelled.
You see, my marriage isn’t perfect. I’ve let my husband down more times than I can count, and he’s said the wrong thing at the wrong time more than once. Like many couples, we’ve occasionally fallen into the trap of keeping score: “Who did what?” “Who forgot to do that thing again?” “Who put in more effort today?” I’ve been annoyed at him for sleeping in once, when I had been up at 5 a.m. with a bright-eyed baby girl and had to ask him to take out the trash because, well… ew. Life gets messy, and tempers flare.
We don’t always get it right.
But here’s the thing—we do get it right, more often than not.
Most days, we tackle life as a team. That’s what marriage really is: stepping up when your partner needs you most; being the person your spouse can count on without question; offering support, reassurance, and a reminder of just how much your life together is worth cherishing.
Marriage isn’t a rom-com. It’s not about grand gestures or perfect timing. It’s about partnership, not competition. It’s forever and always, a daily choice to love, respect, and cherish each other—even when life is messy, exhausting, or downright frustrating.
And sometimes, if you’re really lucky… it’s your husband quietly cleaning the kitchen just because he loves you, without expecting anything in return.
So here’s my advice: marry a man who cleans the kitchen.
